Tag Archives: Black Love Matters

{Naomi’s Story} No, I WANT to Call Him Daddy!

During the month of October, The Real Wife Movement™ will be featuring stories from wives who have blended families. They will share what they did to ensure their families thrived beyond 10 years.

Be inspired by Naomi’s Story.

“I love you, Mr. Sammy.”
Naomi, Sammy and Corlise
Naomi, Sammy and Corlise
Anytime I stop and think about the relationship between my husband and daughter, I always think back to her little 4-year-old voice uttering those words. My husband and I were married in 2005 and my daughter simply adored him!
We had a conversation with my daughter Corlise prior to our wedding, and we explained to her that we were getting married. I mainly focused on telling her that she didn’t have to call him “daddy.” My husband and I were both fine with her referring to him as Mr. Sammy. I remember my daughter saying so clearly and with a big smile on her face, “No, I WANT to call him daddy.” I didn’t know it then, but that was a great lesson for me. 

Her little self knew that if mom and Mr. Sammy were getting married, WE were all going to be one family unit. She never knew

Sammy and Corlise
Sammy and Corlise

about step-parenting until she got older and met other children with step-parents. She came home one day and told me that she and some other children were in conversation about step parents. They wanted to know why my daughter didn’t refer to her dad as a step-dad. She told them, “Because, he’s not.” Her response to those other children made me smile. It caused me to reflect on how my husband has always treated our soon-to-be 17-year-old like a queen and like his own.

He’s loved her, disciplined her, and raised her to love God. My husband has been a great example of God’s unconditional love and acceptance. As believers, we have all been adopted into the Body of Christ and God NEVER treats us like “step” anything! My hope for other blended families is that they keep the concepts of oneness, love, and acceptance at the forefront of their minds.
Our family has been through many ups and downs over the years, but we continue to stand as a family unit, learning how to overcome any obstacles…together.
Naomi Davis is a proud stay-home-mom who loves business and entrepreneurship. Prior to embarking on her
entrepreneurial endeavors, Naomi served in the United States Marine Corps for 10 years. Naomi currently operates a successful home-based child care facility and a home-based travel agency.

 

Visit Naomi at www.starttrippin.com  or at https://www.facebook.com/starttrippintravel.

Want to Compromise Like a Negotiator?

By now, you may know I live life to the fullest. Yet, I had to find a way to compromise like a negotiator to ensure Don felt included. Only recently, did he join my world. Prior to that, he thought I was crazy for having a packed schedule.

Family Time Expo
Family Time Expo

This weekend was yet another one filled with events ,so I asked Don to help a sister out.

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Keshua made this purple set in 2hrs at 8pm and delivered it early the next morning.

I want to share with you how to compromise with your husband to get things done so everyone benefits.

  1. I needed jewelry for my event Saturday but I didn’t have time to pick it up. (My friend Keshua of KK Jewels makes jewelry for my events.) I told him I would “hook him up” later if he ran this errand for me. This made him extremely happy and he eagerly obliged! Hey, it worked for me too! Give and you shall receive, you know what I’m saying.
  2. Doni was an assistant to a full figured model. Don was initially
    Doni and Full Figure model, Erica
    Doni and Full Figure model, Erica

    going to take her so I could go to a house warming. I also knew he REALLY wanted to catch the Cowboys game.  I told him I would take her to the shoot so he could catch some of the game and then we could make the house warming a date. He agreed and  decided to record the game so he could catch all of it later. (This is HUGE LADIES. He chose me over the COWBOYS!!!)

  3. After the housewarming, we headed to the Indie 500 Fashion Show. Since, I am not great at taking pictures with my phone, Iasked Don to help me out. He loves to take pictures, so he was excited about it. Plus, having press passes, placed us in VIP and we had access to the designers and the models.

I found that when Don feels like he is taking an active role in what I have going on, he is more inclined to participate. Find what your honey likes and incorporate that into your negotiations. Marriage must consist of constant compromise for it to work. I am happy we finally figured this out and it makes life easier. When I benefit, he benefits and we get to spend more time together.

What do you do to compromise in  your relationship?

Want ways to improve your marriage? Pick up a copy of my book, Being a Wife Just Got Real by clicking book.
Want ways to improve your marriage? Pick up a copy of my book, Being a Wife Just Got Real by clicking book.

Love Pays Dividends

Love pays dividends big time when you are a giver. This weekend was uber busy for me! I took a 2 day road trip round trip that was exhausting but rewarding.

When I got home, hubby was handling Sunday dinner and getting our teens ready for school the next day. While I was in the shower, he ran out to get me these vibrant orange roses. He said he got them “JUST BECAUSE”. He said that I am always giving to others and he wanted to just give me something he knew I love: flowers.

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Vibrant Thing

Tuesday, he was stuck in traffic for over an hour and only drove about 15 miles from home. He turned around, went home  and decided to take the day off. He called me a few minutes before my lunch break to say he was coming by with lunch-for me. You know the best thing about this, he got my order right without asking what I wanted. LOL!!

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Lunch date side by side in our cars. #LovemesomeHim

To top it all off, he calls me and asks me to come straight home without making any stops. This dude grabs my keys when I walk in the door and heads to get new tires put on my car. I’ve been needing tires for a few months but our schedule never permitted for me to have them replaced.

New tires baby!!!
New tires baby!!!

You may be wondering why I titled this post, Love Pays Dividends. Well, I used to be an extremely selfish wife who complained unmercifully. Once I changed my ways, made deposits of love and respected my husband, he began to reciprocate. So, love does indeed pay dividends and I’m thankful we are both getting a return on our investments.

How do you and your husband make deposits of love into each other?

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Want ways to improve your marriage? Pick up a copy of my book, Being a Wife Just Got Real by clicking book.

Congressional Black Caucus Relationship Panel

3 months after my book launch and 2 months after a total rebranding, I sat on a panel at the Congressional Black Caucus. The panel consisted of  experts in the field of relationships and marriage.

Say what now? The chick who was pregnant at 19 and looking at the military as her only option? The girl who’s baby daddy had another girl pregnant at the same time? Yeah, that girl.

I had the awesome opportunity to work alongside my husband last week. It was definitely a dream come true for the both of us! Granted it was only for 54 minutes, but they are 54 minutes that I will never forget.

I was invited to participate in the Congressional Black Caucus Relationship Panel. I was in shock when I was initially asked to do it. My hubby, on the other hand, was extremely proud of me. He said the hard work I put into my new book, Being a Wife Just Got Real, Things I Wish I knew Before I Said, “I Do” was paying off. He was adamant that it was the direct result of God’s grace on the book. My hubby assured me that God’s desire to see marriages be healthy and whole who be helped with this book.

We met he other couples on the panel and chatted it up. It felt like we knew each other for years. They were especially friendly and we talked with them for several minutes at the end of our segment.

After the panel was over, I had the opportunity to sell my book in the Author Pavilion. I met several other authors who had intriguing books that I will be adding to my home collection of books to read.

I am eternally thankful for this blessed opportunity and the fact that it opened doors for more speaking engagements.

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Want ways to improve your marriage? Pick up a copy of my book, Being a Wife Just Got Real by clicking book.
Want ways to improve your marriage? Pick up a copy of my book, Being a Wife Just Got Real by clicking book.

Real Wife Conversation at the Serendipity Jazz Coffeehouse 

***THEY ARE RELOCATING! FOLLOW THEM ON FACEBOOK.***


The atmosphere was relaxing and quaint. The food was good and the menu was impressive.

I was pleased to have an opportunity to speak with older patrons about Washington, DC in their day prior to the event beginning. Everyone was friendly and the staff was extremely welcoming. Jesse, the owner, was awesome and he thanked me for coming. I loved chatting with him throughout the night. 

The event started off with Tiah introducing me and then I explained the reason why I wrote my book. The conversation took on a life of its own as men and women weighed in on the subject of being a wife. Before I knew it, 2 hours flew by with people still talking about love, relationships, sex, kids and divorce. 

 

Since I had an hour drive to get home, I wrapped up my portion of the discussion to begin the book signing. One gentleman loved my message so much, he bought 5 copies of the book to give away. Another guy bought 3. I believe the men enjoyed the conversation more than the women and I was glad they were able to hear the heart of a woman from a woman.

I have to say, I truly enjoyed this Real Wife Conversation and hope to incorporate more of them where men are involved and can not only be heard but also to hear relationships, from a woman’s point of view.

Do you think men should be included in conversations pertaining the roles of women in relationships?