Monthly Archives: July 2016

Embracing Love

Grand Bahia Principe Jamaica Review

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My husband and I love to travel so we were super excited when we found out we were headed back to Jamaica. We took our yearly trip with our awesome travel agent and a group of 60 people. This year we went to the Grand Bahia Principe Resort, Runaway Bay, Jamaica in July 2016. http://www.bahia-principe.com/en/resorts-in-jamaica/resort-jamaica/

This resort is all inclusive to include alcohol and non-motorized water activities. There was one main buffet place to eat for the entire resort. The breakfast lines were out the door and around the corner every morning. There was a snack shack but it had weird hours.

I promise to give a fair and honest review. This is my 1st review.

  1. The resort is about 1 hour away from the airport.
  2. The resort is huge and has 815 rooms. I felt like it was super crowded and there were kids everywhere.
  3. The front desk staff was not friendly at all. We had a room mix up, asked them to fix it however, they were rude. The staff would go to the back room and not come out for awhile.  Other guests had room issues as well.
  4. Elevators were scarce and far. I didn’t mind it since I usually use stairs but I felt for people who have bad knees or were in wheelchairs. I used my Nike+ app and clocked 3.5 miles in one day walking from the beach, restaurants, pools, my room, etc. If you have little kids, bring a stroller so they don’t have to walk so much.
  5. Since I am coffee drinker, I was looking all over for it in the morning. There are two Nescafe machines at the bar outside the lobby. You can drink coffee all day from these. They also had cold water out all day for you to drink along with pastries in the morning and cookies or muffins during the day.
  6. It was difficult getting dinner reservations at the specialty restaurants. We had to check back every morning to see if they had cancellations.
  7. The pool was beautiful but crowded, so we decided to find chairs over on the adults only side of the resort. It was extremely quiet over there and we enjoyed it.
  8. There are several beach areas. Some portions of beaches are rocky. We walked to the far side of the beach where the beach was smooth and the water was beautiful. There is also a secluded nude beach attached to this side of the beach.
  9. There were weddings everyday inside a gazebo on the beach. Every one that I witnessed was beautiful.
  10. The food was just okay in the buffets so after a few days,  I was over it.
  11. The rooms were spacious and cleaned everyday. The refrigerators had Red Stripe Beer, Coke products and water.
  12. My husband complained that the drinks were watered down so he stuck with Red Stripe. I drank sparkling water mixed with fruit juice as well as virgin cocktails. I tried the wines, but they were bitter.
  13. We went on 2 excursions that I will review in another post. We went to the Bob Marley House and Rick’s Cafe.
  14. Since we were with a group, the check out was easy and our travel agent arranged a shuttle for us to ride back to the airport.

I was not paid to for this review.

Main bar outside the lobby
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Entrance to the resort

One of the beaches

Me and Bae

Pool early in the morning

Close up of pool with swim up bar

View from our room

Lots of paths for walking…not handicap friendly.

Pictures of carpet with stains: the entire resort carpets looked like this

Embracing Love

Does Your P Have These 4 Amazing Powers?

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As a woman, I have learned over the years that people need a lot from us, especially our husbands. In my book, Being a Wife Just Got Real: Things I Wish I Knew Before I Said, “I Do”, I talk about all the roles we play as a wife.

As I was lying in bed in Jamaica last week, I began to think about how powerful my “P” is to my husband. Before you get all uncomfortable and grossed out and click off my page to stage a boycott for indecency, let me explain: this “P” I’m talking about is my PROMISE.

When I promise I will do something for someone, especially my husband, I must remember the amazing power it has. For years, my husband complained that I would promise to pick up his dry cleaning, have sex, simply print off resumes for a job interview, etc., only to forget, ignore or just not follow through. I am recently realizing that this caused him to feel like I didn’t care about his needs.

So, I “promised” him that I would do better and be very intentional about my follow through. After all, I love this guy and want him to feel like I do care about his needs. I came up with these four amazing powers of my “P”. I hope they inspire you to use your “P” to its fullest potential.

  1. My “P”  creates a sense of commitment. For years, my husband felt he didn’t matter to me and that I wasn’t committed to him. I would brush him off and continue to, let’s be honest, disrespect him. Once the light-bulb came on in my thick skull, I began to keep my word to him and now he knows I will keep my promise. If I feel that I can’t do something, I am just honest and tell him upfront that if I can get to it I will, if I can’t, he is disappointed. This has reduced lots of tension and complaints.
  2. My “P”  creates a sense of value. Now that my husband feels like he matters to me, it added a sense of value to him. Unbeknownst to me, men need to feel valued and wanted. Keeping my promise gave him that sense of value in my eyes and he began to trust me more.
  3. My “P” creates trust. Let’s talk about TRUST baby….yeah, well, breaking my img_1298promises over and again for years, caused my husband to lose trust in me. Perfect example, I would tell him, “not now honey, later tonight”. Well, when night rolled around, her went straight to sleep because he didn’t trust me to keep my word, because I was guilty for not following through. Let’s just say, we both went to bed and woke up sexually frustrated, which led to arguments and no sex. I know, that’s stupid but that was my reality.
  4. My “P” creates closeness. Now that I keep my promise with my husband, follow through on keeping my word and don’t blow my husband off, I can feel how close we have become. This closeness has also led to more sex that is enjoyable for the both of us. So girlfriend, make sure you are intentional about using your “P” by honoring your commitment, which creates a sense of value, that builds trust which, leads to closeness in your relationship. (Whew that was a mouthful….)

Have you ever dropped the ball in using your “P” to its fullest potential with you honey? What can you do or have you done to become better in this area?

Embracing Love

3 Reasons Why DownTime is So Important

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Wheels Up! Jamaica bound!
We are in Jamaica this week for some much needed down time! As we were on the plane, we chatted about the importance of these 7 days to our marriage. It’s so crucial to take downtime with your honey and here’s why.

  1. Getting away allows you to do just that – GET AWAY! When you can get away from the daily cares of bills, kids, jobs, grumpy HOA members(Did I say that?), etc. you can relax and breathe. My husband has a high stress job and at minimum, a 1.5hr commute each way, so getting away gives him time to recharge his batteries and focus on life. It gives us time to reconnect and dream together.?
  2. Getting away opens doors for real conversations. You all know I’m big on effective and quality communication, so having this down time, gives us time to reconnect uninterrupted. We sit on the beach and talk, we sit poolside and talk and we actually, have sit down meals – face to face – and talk. The intimacy that comes from the conversations is amazing. I get to hear my husband’s heart without my mind racing or me not being fully engaged. 
  3. Getting away frees you up in the intimacy department. Yes!! I know hubby loves how FREE WE CAN BE! There’s no worrying if the kids hear us or the rush to get to the next thing on the to-do list. We can actually focus on each other, the moment and grow closer in the process. Intimacy in marriage is really a love language that is super special. Getting away allows more freedom to enjoy each other, do things you don’t have time to do ? and the ability to relax in the after glow. 

As you navigate through the summer, take time to get some downtime with your honey, whether is a vacation or a Staycation. 

What do you have planned for downtime with your honey this summer?

Me and Bae at the Grand Bahia Principe-Runaway Bay, Jamaica

Embracing Love

3 Terrible Intimacy Killers to Avoid

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With the summer months heavily upon us, things are really heating up outside. Some people are feeling stressed out so, why not take advantage of this time to heat up the intimacy in your marriage. Trust me, your husband will be thanking you again and again for avoiding these terrible mistakes.

  1. Making him feel guilty for wanting you � Why do we do this??? I have done it so many times by saying things such as, �why do you keep smacking my butt?� and �I�m not a piece of meat for you to have any time you want.� Okay, so if you read my book, you know I share that MEN NEED SEX! Point blank! That�s it! If he is made to feel guilty for wanting his wife, trust and believe the ultra-sexy chick at work will not make him feel guilty for wanting her. Usually, it starts with either of them flirting and then it escalates into the �office wife�.�Do I have your blood boiling now? Good, that was my intention. I want you to get your mind right and create an environment where your husband want only you. Try flirting with him. Why not smack him on his butt? Blind fold him, lead him to your room, and use what God gave you as a gift to your husband.couple-1531266
  2. Just Lying There � No man wants to make love to a person who is not in it. I heard this for years. My husband would say, I could pay a woman to make me feel wanted but I rather get that from you. *Ouch* That hurt. Once I processed his words, I decided to let them real me come out literally and now, we have a fun and exciting sex life. As I look back, I missed out on so much being a boring stick in the mud. I wish I had the insight to enjoy the moment.
  3. Rushing Him Through It � This is a big �NO-NO� and a huge turn off. We all do it. We rush because the kids are in the house, there�s laundry to be folded, dinner to be cooked, we got a head-ache, he done got on your last nerve, and the list goes on and on. Rushing through sex sends the message that we don�t value the intimate moment. Men need that release and what better vehicle for his release than with his wife. Rushing through it, cheapens the moment. I would suggest having a conversation prior to having sex, when things are super sweet. Let him know what you need to be fully engaged. If that means putting a movie on for the kids, or putting the babies to bed early, let him know that you need help with these so he can have your full attention. I�m sure he will understand and offer to help you. Once that�s done, enjoy your husband and have the beautiful sex that you were intended to have. After all, it�s the gift that keeps on giving as long as you two work together.

Which of these three intimacy killers can you improve upon?

 

 

 

 

Black Love, Embracing Love

Open Apology to My Black Husband

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Don feelings
Don breaking down talking about being a black father and husband

I want to first start off with an open apology to my beautiful, strong, BLACK MAN! I am publicly apologizing for not respecting you when you deserve my respect and so much, more.

Watching the news over the last 48 hours got me twisted, babe. I am going to say, I am even a bit ashamed of myself. Here I am, all emotional, tore up and angry because a police officer took yet another, black man’s life. They not only had total disregard for our brothers’ lives, but they also had no respect.

Immediately, God arrested me in my moment of disgust. He clearly showed me how I have been no different: I just didn’t use a gun as my weapon of choice.

Here I was indignant that these men were murdered, but I murdered your spirit with my hateful thoughts and words. Here I was pissed off that these men didn’t get a chance to speak for themselves, yet, I’ve walked away form conversations without giving you a chance to speak your mind.

Countless times, I immediately assumed the worse of you and in those moments, disrespected you with my words and actions. Oftentimes, I purposefully shut you down with my sharp tongue. Other times, I called you names, degraded you and even said things I knew would hurt you to your core. I was careless in how I treated you, I punished you with no sex, I embarrassed you in front of friends and family.

No-I didn’t use bullets to hurt and maim you, but my poison was just as damaging and deadly. 

So, TODAY, I pledge to honor and lift you up! I pledge to pray for you! I pledge to listen to your concerns, your hurts, your fears, without trying to FIX YOU! That’s not my job; my job is to love you unconditionally.

I pray that you will forgive me and that we can forge together to raise our BLACK SON to be a loving BLACK HUSBAND just like you. #BLACKLIVESMATTER #BLACKLOVEMATTERS
Photo credit: LadyRedd Creations Photography